Monday, March 23, 2009

Golf and the Mirror

Somewhere in my readings of Robert T. Kiyosaki’s books, I recall him saying “Playing golf is like seeing yourself in the mirror.”

He went on to explain why businessmen played golf before deciding whether or not to have dealings with a person; implying that you can somewhat learn a person’s character by watching him play. You can understand yourself and others better. His words intrigued me.

And so it happened, by chance or intervention, that one my colleagues who plays golf came to see me before he got a transfer. Somehow the topic came up. Before he left, he took the initiative to hook up another colleague to teach me a few swings of golf. My teacher seemed more eager than I and asked me everyday, when our first lesson would be. After many postponements due to work, it finally came to pass!

To sidetrack a little, even before we began, I told my teacher of what a ‘kaki bangku’ (in Malay: someone who is not good at any sport – directly translated: bench feet) I was. But I didn’t say that in my childhood days, I used to be very shy, quiet, timid, conscious of making mistakes in public and sensitive to people’s watchful eyes – resulting in a kid that preferred to sit on the bench and just observe, sometimes with a book in my hand. I had attempted some sports, only because it was compulsory. I didn’t like games where you have to ‘fight’ with so many others for a single ball. In university, I took up tennis for recreation. Although I didn’t quit, I was always counting the days to the final lesson as it turned to be stressful instead - the harsh coach made every session a pain to endure.

Back to my golf teacher, he’s a well built, middle aged, sturdy man, who always speaks on an assertive note. He took me to the shop to get my glove. As for the equipment, he let me use his to give golf a shot, seeking out the lightest iron as his was meant for men. It was my very first time in the range, and my teacher was extremely patient in coaching me. Being a left hander, I was told it is better to learn the conventional way for ease of finding equipment. So, I agreed.

After 2 hours, I still didn’t manage to get the ‘full swing.’ However, I did understand what it means to see yourself in the mirror when playing golf (or rather, learning, for me).

My teacher, who was observing my body movements, kept pointing out the mistakes. One in particular: after the swinging the iron, I hesitated upon nearing the ball, which is why the ball never made it more than 2 meters away.

“Just let it go…Swing it full…don’t think too much… just hit it!”

My teacher kept saying, but I still found it difficult simply release.

I saw my own reflection –that is exactly how I approach new things in life. Trying to understand enough, contemplating whether or not I am doing it right, if I could really hit the mark - all which make me slow down upon reaching that moment in time to ‘just do it.’

We shouldn’t limit ourselves with doubts when we have the potential to go further.

Another lesson I learnt was about focus. “Keep your eyes on the ball, until after you’ve hit it,” my teacher advised me.

He said the reason the ball headed the wrong direction was because I turned too quickly to see where it was going, resulting in my entire body making unnecessary movements. I realized that that’s what I do in life too. Not keeping my eyes on the goal until it is fully accomplished, and looking if I can see results before it’s time. It causes me to lose equilibrium and feel disappointed. What we actually need to do is keep our eyes on the right thing, and do it right. Then the results would work out for itself.

The third element I grasped was the importance of control and balance. The term ‘keep your feet on the ground’ to imply firmness really made sense in the game. My teacher remarked I moved my hips and feet too much.

He said, “You’re just supposed to swing the iron, but you are swinging your whole self together with it!”

Yeah, sometimes I lose balance, and that makes me lose control. If my feet were planted firmly on the ground, I would have had more control over my body. In life it’s like that too. Sometimes failing to make a stand, can send us flying in a different direction. Little things that should be put in their place, if neglected, can cause a whole chain of reactions.

Finally, I discovered that discipline is the key in achieving anything at all, even just to learn how to swing a golf club. When my teacher said my arm was not kept straight, I worked on it till it improved a little. Then he reprimanded my feet and hips, and I focused too much on that till I forgot about the arms and started bending them.

That’s when I recognized the importance of discipline – we are creatures of habit, and shaping our actions to the acceptable, desired pattern requires going against what we normally do. It needs focus and control on every aspect that we want to change. And that takes a lot of effort, time and perseverance.

After those two hours or so with my colleague, I also realized I have changed a lot since childhood – in regards to sports. I didn’t seem to mind making such glaring errors in front of others. (FYI: the closest balls were all mine :P), though I admit a tinge of embarrassment after all his tips (but what do you expect, it was my first time!). And I was ok with my teacher commenting on me in public, with many eyes on me (I learnt to watch them back – their moves, I mean). The training on my job has done me good personally, I must say. And I was happy.

Not forgetting my observations of my teacher – that he is a patient man, and can be nice. It’s funny to remember we started on the wrong foot at work. I asked myself why I never thought of this earlier. Everything has its time and season, I suppose.

Those were the few things I learnt in my first experience of golf. And it amazes me to think a game that originated from some shepherds knocking stones in rabbit holes could gain such affluence, commercialization and offer profound meanings. The minds that created the rules, strategies and added final touches to the sport must be sheer genius!

As for me, I don’t know when I’m going to get the swing, but some golf sure made me see myself.

-JJ-

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